it's hard for me to get angry..

but as a human i've my limit...

as i express my anger...

straight away people judge me saying that i should say that...

because im big enough i should act maturely..

i dont respect the older..and so on...

and what make me sad..

why is it he never take note all my good posts but why suddenly he shot my angry post?

i cant be angry i cant be sad n i cant share it too...

what else do i have other than keep it to myself and let the tears heal the heartache...

seems like that the only choice i have...

you've killed the last piece..nothing left...nothing left...nothing left...='((

fatigue day yet still smiling

since the 1st day i worked till today...none of the days was tiring me this much...=,=''''

even during fasting month i didnt feel this tired..

all because of ECS...and this is another reason why i dislike ECS...

the text book is from KPT...students cant buy it themselves which i myself need to collect money in the class drive bout 10min to Language Centre and take the book and give to students...

i lost almost 40minutes of the class time for collecting money and taking the books...

ok imagine today i got 3 ECS classes which needed me to go to and fro 3 times...fatigue!!

really comot today...because of i was sweating my eyeliner comot and my student tegur me..

miss mata miss....
why? napa mata saya??
tu...tu...
apa?
comot cikit...miss nak tisu...?
hUhuhu saya dah mcm pa ni penat la syg...anyway thanks...

sian miss...

sy sian jugak kt diri sniri hihihi...

then right after the class i was rushing to UTLC to submit the Pensijilan assignments...

YEYYYYY!!! I'VE SUBMITTED TUGASAN 1-6....

only need to submit tugasan 7 later hehehe...legaaaaaaaaaa....

ok back to ECS...haaa in one class i got 31-33 students...but for each class only 25-29 that have bought the book...which means there are 2-6 students who have not bought yet...

which also means...I NEED TO DO THE SAME THINGS NEXT WEEK..!!! aaaaaaaaaa stressfullll....!!!

i dont understand why cant i keep all the book needed in my office then whoever pay i give la...dont have to go to Language Centre...really wasting time...

or why cant the students themselves go there and buy....why must i become the ceti???

however.....

while being comot...kalot...penat...serabut...

i still got the reasons to smile...

my ex students looked for my class and they found me..they waited for me outside the class just to say hi...then while walking at the corridor with them i saw another class which my other darlings were inside the class....they saw me and they ran towards me....!

how i really miss them....

they even usik me for not wearing 4 inches heels today hihihi...they ejek me pendek!!!
the naughty part never change...that makes me miss them even more...

hehehe they scolded me for not teaching them this semester...

i said jodoh xpanjang ihihihi...but i asked them to arrange 1 time for reunion...something like bbq ke kan...

ya they really made me smile...=)) thanks guys...you'll always be in my heart...love yaaaa

ECS~~

this afternoon i went for the new subject course briefing...

my comment bout the subject...hmmm

IT'S KILLING INSTEAD OF HELPING....IT'S TORTURING INSTEAD OF DEVELOPING

why did i say so?

because there are a lottttttt of assignments..it's like every week they need to submit something...

thennnn i also need to cover the text book which is like secondary school text book which we use for 1 year period...but this 1 is for 1 semester (14 weeks)...just imagine how many exercises inside there???

and still it's compulsory to give them HOMEWORK...

their assignments are:

4 journal writing...3 presentations...2 paper works...1 vocabulary test...1 documentation..1 pre test and 1 post test...submit 8 online quizzes..

i got 31-33 students in a class...all together 4 classes=almost 160 students...

the group work must be maximum 3 members and minimum 2..

what im trying to say here is how can i finish the presentation part in a day in 1 class which at the same time i still need to touch the text book..1 group will take the shortest 10minutes and the longest may be 15-20 minutes...i need to finish 10-11 groups in 95minutes??

exercise in the text book cant be given as homework as they got separate worksheet for the homework part...

ENGLISH COMMUNICATION SKILL...

where got communication??? all writing reading only...

two times of presentations..are they enough to improve students' speaking skill??

hahaha dont bluff la...and what surprise me is, the syllabus is from KPT itself...

ooo yaaa...in the pre test and post test most of the questions are about grammar...whereas non of the assignments and only a lil part of the text book touch on grammar...then how to improve?

why i hate this subject?

because students do a lotttt of works but the improvement is uncertain, vague...and i'll end up being in frustration.

what make me feel frustrated is english classes should be fun..attractive..interesting and developing...i like the subject which has been replaced by this subject where it had role play, speech..students could express themselves...have fun but at the same time they could practise their language skill..

now they are struggling with assignments..and they'll complete it for the sake of mark...that is...

not for developing their communication skills...

KPT....i really dont understand what is in your mind...and after undergoing 14 weeks i hope the KPT can prove me wrong bout my earlier perception pertaining this subject...

legaaa...!!!

alhamdulillah i've finished all assignments to be submitted this month...

thanks to yana, nadia n fadhli...=))

then 1 more in march and 2 more in may..

now i can focus to the teaching strategies for observations..

kena bt baik ngn budak2 ni heheh kasi rasuah...=p just kidding...

like last semester, monday's classes are more fun than sunday...

dont know why...

the students are more happening and make me easy to be myself...

sunday's classes are boredd....they are so skema even i ask to make some noise...

ayoooo....is it because of sunday? or the students themselves?

pa2 je la..what i know is i just do my job..=))

okayyy time to study BRW...i almost forgot the content huhuhu...tomorrow need to start chapter 1...ok daaaa...

p/s~~xtau napa hati ni rasa xhappy...ada sesuatu yang buat hati ni glisah...hmmm

lost the rhythm~~

done for today...

damnnn i lost the rhythm...hilang rentak beb...

what rentak?

rentak to enter the class cheerfully...

i entered and straight away i sat at student's seat...wait till 15 minutes..

i listened to their conversation....

"sapa lecturer weh? tah nama henny haryani...mcm omputeh"

ok that one i felt like laughing...

then 1 student asked me..."amik kos ape" "asal mana"

i replied "kami amik marketing..asal kedah jgk"

hihihi that 1 also tahan gelak...okkk cukup 15 minutes i stood up n went to lecturer's table then suddenly everybody was silent...hihihihi gotchaaa...!!

welll that only happened for the 1st 2 classes..the last class i didnt have the mood..just short briefing then bye2....

i lost the rentak in term of i dont feel the excitement like how i felt last sem....

i want to have that feeling which make me cheerful and enthusiastic...

may be because after semester break..need sometime to get the rentak...

or may be because im too concern about the unfinished assignments...

or may be im worried about being observed later....

or may be i was hoping my ex students were there in front of me who actually not...

the same classes remind me of them..damnnnn how i miss u guys...my I5 n J5....

well the BRW classes also seem so skema...it makes me feel weird to smile...

adoiiii i dont like this feeling...i want the excited feeling back...ok i try to have it back within 1 month....ya i should or else i'll feel forced to enter the class which i dont want...

pity my students if i have that kind of feeling....

hmmmm i really hope this semester will be like last semester or even more...

yenny...trust me..u can do it...=))

p/s~i've finished tugasan 1 assignment pensijilan...lega ckit....and...no chance to cuci mata...xsama slera...=p

my 2nd semester~~the challenging one =p

funny isnt it?

they are introducing new subject..english communication skill which replaced english for communication 1...the syllabus is from KPT...n the funny thing is we know nothing bout this subject which i need to teach tomorrow...

even the subject coordinator doesnt know when to make the subject briefing...

keja katun btul dorg ni...so what i can do tomorrow is enter the class...sengehhhh ice breaking blahh...30min enough i guess...and i cant inform anything regarding books that are going to be used... assessment and etc...

haiiiii tomorrow is the 1st day...and im still cuak even this is my 2nd semester...

anyway i miss my fav class I5 and J5..hope i can find the excitement like how i taught them...

very supportive..very enthusiastic in joining the class activities....

guys i miss u..hahaha wait ya i go and kaco u guys during exam...=p

ok so tonight i'll try to finish 2 or 3 assignments..prepare for tomorrow class structuring..then get enough sleep...first day is always the tiring day....

p/s~~nk try wat drama la esok...hihihi pretend to be a student

and wait for the lecturer to enter ngeh3...(prasan muda)

hehehe I5 heroes~~

my I5 darlings~~

my sayangs J5~~~

ok can u see that bunga on my head?...hehehe this sem i wanna be miss bunga...=p

finish FASA 1~~

yeyyyyyy at last 12 torturing days have ended.....

this morning i had to teach in front of the Ketua Jabatan...

gilaaa cuak habaq hanggg...

heheheh i taught bout Future Tense...well i just love grammar veryyy much...(suka ye bukan pakar..salah merata jugak..=p)

what surprised me was she said i've used the simplest way to make students who hate grammar to start getting interested in grammar...weeee i take it as a big compliment..=)

she gave me 91/100 marks....yaa that really motivates me to be more enthusiastic in teaching grammar through the easiest way...and this also give me some encouragement to publish books hehehhe angan2 besar gajahh..!!

right after that i met my mentor..Tuan Hj. Shuib...

"im not easy to give an A..but if you really deserve it i'll be glad to give an A"

that what he told me..he's from faculty of education..so he expects me to write a detail lesson plan like how i did during practicum...luckily lesson plan is not a new thing for me..at least that can lighten the burden apart from 17 assignments kan...=p

ya i can do it bebeh hihihihi....cuma srabut je laaa...pffttt...

slow2....xpenah lagi dengar org mati sebab buat assignments...hihihi so i wont be the first to die because of it..=p

my mentor is going to observe 4times...Penolong Naib Canselor once..and peer once..overall 6times...= 60% another 40 is for teaching portfolio and reflection on the lesson...

ok it's going to be a loonggggg semester for me..huhuhu...

next week the semester will start....CUAKKK..!!!

~~more pensijilan stuff~~

hehehehe...xstart pa lagi dh gelakk...saje muda kan jiwa yg xlama lagi akan naik setahun lg huhuhu....

yaaaa pensijilan got 3 more days to go....yessss cant wait to be freeee...

but still not free from assignments lorrrr....xpe work smart hehehe...tau la nk klentong..

but still afraid for the last day which is mock teaching in front of the Director of Language Centre weeee...ketaq lutut2... =,=''''

for the sake of pensijilan i spent on hot ticket internet..i have to or else i would die inside the hall with eyes wide open hihihih...so if u ask what have i learnt? hahaha better dont ask laaa...

aku klentong ja lebih nnt...=p

but this pensijilan also give me inspiration...2 of the facilitator who are Dr.Fauziah and Dr. Aznida inspire me how to handle a class but at the same time enjoy what im doing which is being playful in the class hehehe...they make me realize being playful is also one of the teaching techniques hihihihi....but of course there must be a limit...

for now im satisfy with what i have...but the challenge is i need to maintain 93% performance score for 3 years in a row in order to get the permanent status...huhuhu mmg mencabar... need to get involve in many side activities...

well im planning to publish a book..a collaboration with my mami...perhaps about grammar n some story books..

then kak aida n kak yati invited me to make a collaboration in publishing pictorial dictionary...spanish german english....hope the project can be started within this year....

ya im not a 'berwawasan tinggi' type of person but i love to do thing that i feel love to do... based on own initiative...if u force me mmg mcm taik la muka....hehehe

just pray everything will run smoothly...

MASTER??? ahahhaahah that's a big question..when m i going to continue my master?

insyallah within this year on early next year...but im still confused whether to take by course or course and dissertation....hmmm let me think deeper...what i really hope is while taking master i can still have time to socialize...can still have time to study n prepare for classes...

yenny use ur time wisely yaaa...hihihih....

ok daaaaa......=))

p/s~saham tngh naik but still dont have the heart to be with anybody hihihi.... prefer to be in relationship with works n students at the moment...=))

practical period..ONCE AGAIN..!!

12 torturing days...huaaaa....

listening to talks for 12 days...

8.30-4.30pm....what 4.30?? no laaaa they lajak till 5pm..!

this is program pensijilan...one of the requirement to be a permanent staff...

they teach how to teach and bla bla bla...even though i have degree in education...

but with this program i am qualified to teach in any other local universities...

really2 torturing..

then what's next...ya congratulation....7 assignments...all about psychology..philosophies..teaching method..pedagogy andragogy what other gogy2...huhuhu....

then the old fren of mine suddenly appears..who? hahaha of course la miss LESSON PLAN...huaaaaa need to dig back the CREATIVE AND CRITICAL thinking...ya creative la sgt hahahha....need to apply all the bloom taxonomy based activities...=/

5 assignments need to be submitted in february...right after the semester start...what???

it means HEADACHE...!! 1 in the middle 1 at the end...need to prepare TEACHING PORTFOLIO some more...aiyoooooo......need to do revision....find back psychology philosophy micro n macro teaching books....huhuhuhu....relax2...time to refresh the knowledge and apply them in class....

5 observations in a semester...during practical i was only being observed twice...

tu pun mcm nak mati nervous nak mampos....ni 5 times...!!

im sure it will be a loooonnnggggg semester for me huhuhu...

1.be punctual to class

2.be strict no more play2

3.study yenny study hahahaha....

ya Allah please help me in undergoing this challenging semester....

class preparation...lesson plan...assignments...diploma scheme or work...(future coordinator need to handle diploma thingy) =((

then need to teach new subject...have to study first...paper work for ISO unit and workshop...and also paper work for Kelab Pusat Bahasa....pheewwww...huhuhuhu

listing down those works already made my knees tremble....

hmmm....i hope i can still find time to socialize even on facebook hihihihi...

penting okk..!! if not i'll die with my eyes wide open hahaha....

ishhh astaghfirullahalazim.....

anyway i still hope and wish u guys have great days ahead....at least by knowing u guys are happy can make me happy too...=)))

pray for me so that i can get through this challenging semester successfully....go yenny!!!